Brussels 

Lots of mussels in Brussels! …I’m sure no one has ever said that before. I don’t really like mussels so I didn’t have any. So, sorry, no story to tell there. I just wanted to make a rhyme. We went to a musical instrument museum! We were given an audio guide that demonstrated how varying instruments from all over the globe and from different centuries sounded. There are some weird ass instruments out there. One instrument sounded like a fart. Now if that’s music, then I’m a bloody expert. My favourite instrument was the touch fingerboard. I want one! The museum closed before we had a chance to see the final floor. 

If you’re in Brussels, then I recommend visiting the Galerie de la Reine which is full of beautiful chocolate shops and they give you free samples! They make sure to only give one sample per customer. I wish I had bought a fake pair of glasses and a stick-on moustache so I could go in for more. Belgium chocs though- Cor blimey! I would have to take out a bank loan if I wanted one of those selection packs. Each chocolate was neatly seated in a cosy leather case. Leather. Leather. Every choccie is so delicately designed, they’re almost too good to eat. Almost. The chocolate and jewellery stores look so similar because they both have detailed and delicate items. You can imagine my surprise when I tried to bite into a ‘what I thought’ was a tasty white chocolate treat, but was actually a pearl earring. Oh, whilst we are on the topic of delicious and delicate food, my toenail from the whirlpool incident fell off today. Marvellous. 

The next day we wanted some more free samples so took another walking route of the chocolatiers. We also wanted to see the Manneken Pis fountain that the internet and our travel book were telling us so much about. It was shit. It’s a small fountain of a child urinating into a basin. What’s more disurbing is that all the shops sell edible versions of this sculpture. To be honest and call me old fashioned if you want, but I don’t really want to eat a chocolate mound of a naked child holding his penis. WEE continued to walk around the streets and shops and took some pretty snaps. On to our next destination…Paris! 

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